“Aging is not for the faint of heart” is an adage we have heard like forever!
In conversation with a dear friend recently, she spoke of how when her young grandchildren come to see her, they are not encouraged to give her a hug or a kiss. Sometimes she is too proud/hurt to say, “come give me a hug”.
We all want to be loved and sometimes a hug is a great cure to the loneliness we feel. I am so thankful that my children and stepchildren have through the years encouraged their children to hug their grandparents. However, my heart hurts for my friend.
I have come to realize in my “maturing” years that there are truly a LOT of lonely people, not just older people, but some young people who just sometimes need a hug. As I watched my mother-in-law age (she lived to be 100), her world grew smaller and smaller. When she was able, she went to her church and Sunday School, or to a monthly dinner with her peers. But as she aged, she participated less and less. I would try to always call her on my way to a weekly Bible study in a nearby town. I knew she looked forward to hearing from her family and friends, especially as she became more homebound. We are told in Genesis 2:18b (NASB) that we, from the beginning of Creation, were created for community and companionship…”it was not good for man to be alone”.
In the past few years with all the pandemic and Covid, the fear of the unknown, people have come more isolated and lonelier. I can include myself among the masses after spending 6 days in the hospital with covid. I was isolated and longed for my family and human touch, and a hand to hold. In this season of time, I held on to one of my favorite verses found in Isaiah 41:10 (NIV) “Do not fear, for I am with you, do not be dismayed, for I am your God, I will strengthen you; I will uphold you with my righteous/victorious right hand.” In this season, I became painfully aware of what was/is happening around us.
We, as followers of Christ, have been given a precious gift, a heart of compassion for others. John 13:35 (NASB) says “by this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.
Since I grew up in the 70’s I remember a line in a Beatles song: “look at all the lonely people, where do they come from?” I have my suspicions that through all these years it is from our lack of “seeing and feeling” the loneliness of others. I think we are overdue in putting down our iPhones, iPads and laptops and asking God to help us see others through His eyes, and just maybe He will put someone in our path that needs a hug or a word of encouragement.
There was a season after I was divorced where going to church was very painful. I had always been a “family'', we had friends that we did life with, but divorce thrust me into a life of being alone and church was a lonely place. I, for the most part, sat and cried quietly by myself. Then I began to study the book of James and it became my favorite book in the Bible. There is an admonition in Chapter 2 that states (this is my own version) if a young, good looking, “hot” person comes into your gathering, wearing flashy gold rings and a Rolex watch, dressed in Gucci, Nike, Dior designer clothing and then (of all the nerve) comes into the same room a person in poor and dirty clothes (looking a little ragged and rough around the edges). And you, being in charge, say to the well dressed, good looking individual “Please sit her in this place of special recognition in the spotlight” and then you say to the poor, not so good looking, person, “You will need to move to the corner or the back of the room." Jesus states, through the pen of James, “You have dishonored the poor man, but it is these rich, well dressed, talk about you when you’re not in the room, that enslave you because you are trying to match their lifestyles and you have ignored the lonely, depressed homeless. I have asked you to love your neighbor as yourself”. Verse 8 of the second chapter calls it the Royal Law – meaning the Heavenly Kingdom Law. Maybe, because as a divorcee and that was what I felt was happening to me, so I asked God to show me those who were ignored, and lonely.
My prayer today is that I, my children, stepchildren, and grandchildren will daily ask Jesus to open our eyes to those around us to offer an encouraging word, a smile and a hug. It can be a lifeline to someone.
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