Here’s the thing: God is never not working, never not restoring, never not weaving His golden thread of goodness into every area of your life. These things are His nature and He never departs from that–*deep sigh of relief*, I know. Here is just one story (of hopefully a jillion you’ll hear in your lifetime) of God continuing to work, restore, and weave His goodness beyond what I could see. As you read this, here is my prayer over you: “I am contending for you that your hearts will be wrapped in the comfort of heaven and woven together into love’s fabric. This will give you access to all the riches of God as you experience the revelation of God’s great mystery—Christ.” Colossians 2:2.
I was the little girl playing mama with her dolls, the teenager knowing she wanted to be a stay at home mom, and the college student studying child development so she could take parenting and family classes. I wanted to be a mother for as long as I could remember, with an even heightened desire for it when I lost my own mother at the age of 14.
I was also the girl who thought she’d get pregnant the very first time they tried. More than 3 years, countless meds, and seemingly never ending doctor appointments later, I was the girl who was exhausted and defeated and still not pregnant. Side note-if you’re in this season, I know how hard it is. I know you’re fighting back tears, dreading that negative pregnancy test, riding the roller coaster of hormones, and I KNOW that I KNOW God isn’t done with your story.
We were at loss of what to do next. My body, heart, mind, and spirit were all exhausted. So we paused our fertility journey to really ask the Lord what was next. It was a big “ok Lord, we truly cannot do this on our own, we’re surrendering more than we ever have, SOS” kinda asking season.
“And if anyone longs to be wise, ask God for wisdom and he will give it! He won’t see your lack of wisdom as an opportunity to scold you over your failures but he will overwhelm your failures with his generous grace.” James 1:5.
I think sometimes we are waiting on our own “burning bush” moment, if you will, like a big ah-ha, audible voice of the Lord, billboard style direction and guidance. And I also think that the Lord is really into invitations- little nudges, gut feelings, small details that take being present to notice. Do I think He sometimes shows up in the super clear ah-ha, “I am fully called to this” kinda way? Absolutely. Do I think He really delights in us choosing something that He is inviting us into? Absolutely, yes and amen. That’s how our story went.
Long story short, the moment we started talking about adoption it was like a huge gust of wind, fresh breath and lightness flooded over us. Did we hear God directly say “you are called to adopt”? Nope. Did we feel a deep, soul-filling peace that made us lean into the possibility of that direction? Yep. He was inviting us into a wild journey with Him. I felt Him say, “it’s going to be wild, it’s going to be great, it’s going to be full of Me” (thanks United Pursuit for those lyrics).
And so it was: WILD, GREAT, FULL OF HIM. Our precious daughter joined our family in May 2019, about a year and a half into our adoption journey (GREAT). We were able to connect with her birth mother through a family we met on our first day in our sight-unseen, tiny apartment as we moved 3,000 miles across the country to Redding, CA. The family we met moved into the same tiny apartment complex the exact same day, from an entirely different part of the country, and 7 years later connected us with our daughter’s birth mother (WILD).
So hear me out, 7 years before we grew our family through adoption the Lord intentionally and ever-so kindly created a connection that led us to the brave woman who placed her daughter for adoption and chose us to be her family. We’d been married two weeks at this point. We had zero plans of adopting. AND STILL, God knew. God was creating His restoration story before restoration was even needed. God was weaving His goodness into our story like a thread, sewing together details of a story we didn’t even know existed. He made a way before we even needed a way. If I could shout it from all the rooftops that He is just the kindest, I truly would. Everyday I get to snuggle a literal miracle from heaven, a tangible testimony of His kindness, and my daughter who lights up the room with her sunshine presence.
God is never not working, never not restoring, never not weaving His golden thread of goodness into every area of your life. These things are His nature and He never departs from that.
“God, everyone sees your goodness,
for your tender love is blended into everything you do. Everything you have made will praise you, fulfilling its purpose.”
Psalm 145:9.
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